Does God Use Half-Hearted Yeses?

Lesson #2 on a Journey to a Water Well.

Have you ever said yes when you wanted to say no but didn’t feel like you could say no?

Me too.

I tried this strategy with God several years after the Holy Spirit first whispered Africa into my spirit. Initially, I had declined His invitation to Africa but intuitively knew His expectation was yes.

So, at twenty-one years old, I said yes but meant no. With a mix of resolution and resignation, I boarded a plane despite the sign’s prominent display, “The U.S. Department of State does not recommend travel to Lagos International Airport.” After twenty-four hours of travel, with great joy and unparalleled relief, a man named Lucky with a red hat waved his arms enthusiastically as he called my name and rescued me from the Custom Agent’s interrogations about my final destination. After five more hours of driving along unmarked roads with a Nigerian driver, the pavement ended at Eku Baptist Hospital. The twelve-foot-high cement walls surrounding the hospital compound with protruding shards of glass simultaneously conveyed safety and danger.

I’ll never forget one evening, while in Nigeria, I was walking back from the missionary’s home to my private residence as thick clouds hung low. The locals had sabotaged the primary generator, and a secondary generator powered a few lights in the hospital. All other structures within the hospital’s compound sat in darkness, including my path and temporary home. I clung to my flashlight and briskly walked towards my residence. About halfway home, I heard something beside me. I pointed my flashlight to the right and saw a beautiful bright smile. A Nigerian man was walking beside me, unbeknownst to me.

I smiled back but walked faster.

My half-hearted yes placed me in vulnerable situations and revealed my struggle to trust God. But I wasn’t alone in my struggle to believe God when His plans did not seem good.  Do you know who else struggled with half-hearted yeses?

Moses.

In Exodus 3 and 4, God called to Moses from a burning bush on the far side of the desert. God told Moses to confront Pharoah in Egypt and free God’s people from oppression. Moses wasn’t so sure of God’s plans. He asked God for assignment clarifications before reminding God that he wasn’t qualified for the job. Finally, he said what a lot of us want to say,

 “O Lord, please send someone else to do it.”

Exodus 4:13 NIV

Moses was honest with God about his struggle. He didn’t hide his fears. But God did not free Moses from His conviction; instead, He equipped him to fulfill his calling. God addressed every weakness Moses proposed. He assured Moses of His Presence, His Power, and His Words. And He gave him tangible reminders of each with a cloud by day and fire by night, a staff, and Aaron to speak on his behalf.

Reluctantly, Moses offered God a half-hearted yes. God didn’t waste Moses, yes, and He won’t waste ours. Moses may have started his ministry with a half-hearted yes in the far side of the desert, but he ended it in the believer’s hall of fame. (Hebrews 11).

God wants to move us from unfulfillment to fulfillment. But sometimes, we don’t realize we’re living in unfulfillment.

And the path God’s suggesting doesn’t seem like the road to satisfaction. Often the far side of the desert feels better than the path to the promised land if we have to give up what we treasure to journey with difficult people on long trips and with few supplies.  I get it.

But it’s hard to grasp the magnitude of God’s Faithfulness if we never step out of the safety and security of our well-orchestrated lives.

Sometimes we use our comfortable lives to hide from God and where He might be leading. Kind of like Moses when he preferred to remain in the desert rather than fulfill his calling to free God’s people. No one wants to walk down life’s dimly lit paths, not knowing where or when or why or how. But sometimes, it’s the only time we’re still enough to sense His presence or hear His voice.

Looking back, I realize the man walking beside me on the dimly lit path was my hired guard, and his presence reminds me a lot of God. He’s always there looking out for us. Whether we realize it or not. Other times, God’s presence looks more like a stranger in a red hat enthusiastically waving his hands while he calls you by name.   We don’t always know what God’s doing or saying, but He wants us to know He’s always Faithful. (2 Tim. 2:13)

Truthfully, it took a decade of poor choices and poor motives for me to begin to grasp the magnitude of God’s Faithfulness.

Ultimately it’s His Faithfulness that softens our hearts to His love. Moses’ confidence and love for God grew with each promise God fulfilled. His life wasn’t easy, but it was world-changing. And God never left him.

I’m not sure where God’s leading you.  Maybe God’s asking you to let go of the things that have been holding you captive. Or maybe, He’s leading you to serve Him in a new way. Don’t be surprised if the world sends you a “sign” telling you not to go where God is leading.  Not everyone will understand what you should do, and you may have ample time to ponder why. This is part of the journey.

Just remember, it’s hard to experience God’s faithfulness if we never do anything that requires faith. And the best thing you can do to experience God’s faithfulness is say yes to Him.

Lessons learned through a journey to a water well in Uganda.

1. Fixating on fear will prevent you from saying yes and taking steps of faith.

2. If you want to experience God’s faithfulness, you must do something that requires faith. Say yes to Him.

Want more? Start here…

1. Read Exodus chapters 3-4.

2. Notice the different ways Moses tried to disqualify himself from the job. In what ways have you tried to disqualify yourself from what God is asking?

3. Notice how freely Moses shared his objections with God. How does this demonstrate intimacy in their relationship?

4. God fulfilled His promise to deliver the Israelites from Egyptian oppression, but it was slow and difficult. What does this teach you about God’s faithfulness and the processes He uses to fulfill His Word?

5. Where is God leading you?